A Guide To Saying HI
Sometimes it’s kinda tough(or really, really tough depending on your level of introvertedness vs. extrovertedness) to know what to say or do when you’re meeting someone new.
Man, I get it! So, to be unsure of how to approach someone with special needs could seem pretty overwhelming. I just want you to know that you can take a breath and relax. Remember that EVERYONE, no matter who they are, needs to feel loved, valued, and wanted. Focus your efforts on doing those things and you’ll be fine!
So here are a few simple things you can do when approaching someone with Down Syndrome or anyone with special needs:
1. SMILE!!! If you don’t do anything else, just smile!!! You don’t need to avert your eyes, put your head down and walk on the other side of the street. Simply look your sweet new friend IN THE EYES , and SMILE!
“We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do”
- Mother Teresa
One of Elijah’s FAVORITE things to do is to come up to me JUST for a smile. He gets my attention and once he has it, he will look straight into my eyes and smiles the BIGGEST smile he can, and then he keeps eye contact until I do it back. He is filled to the brim with excitement and fulfillment by one simple jester - a smile. And then usually that’s all he needs! After we connect, still grinning from ear to ear, he moves on in total bliss. My friends, NEVER underestimate the power of a smile.
2. SAY “HI”! Start a conversation the way you’d start with one with anyone else, by saying “HI”!
These two amazing people put it perfectly (also, do yourself a favor and follow their accounts: @eicherumba and @sevymarieart)
https://youtu.be/FZjX79Yot1M
3. BE PATIENT! Speaking (verbal communication), using a communication device, or any other form of communication can often take a WHOLE LOT of effort.
Elijah is able to understand a LOT of what you say. However, because of muscle tone and a some other things, verbal communication takes effort and focus. What you can do to form words and phrases without a second thought, takes a lot of energy and concentration for Lij. Don’t get me wrong, he is capable and VERY MUCH able to communicate. and the more he learns and grows, the more he’ll do!
ALWAYS assume competence and that the people you are around are capable of communicating. Be kind and take the time.
4. KEEP IT SIMPLE! This might apply more to younger kiddos (mommas you can weigh in on this one!) Elijah is AMAZING at understanding and processing what you communicate with him. However, when there is an overload of information (aka, you ask him five different questions back to back) he can get a little overwhelmed by all the incoming info! (Shoot, I do the same thing). So KEEP IT SIMPLE! Ask how his day was, then STOP and wait for a response. (Instead of asking how his day was, and what he ate, and did he have fun, and are you hungry - all at the same time)
5. Lastly, talk like you would talk to any typical person! If it’s a baby, do all the baby talk your heart desires. If, however, who you are talking to is not an actual baby, don’t talk like one! Part of making someone feel valued and loved is making them feel like they belong. So talk to them like they belong, like they are included and a part of what’s going on. Use your normal speaking voice, and just be you! (The kind and thoughtful version of you)
I’d love to hear from you! What are your experiences and how have you’ve been able to place value and worth on the people in your life!
Photo cred: @sweetnectorsociety