POTTY

  Holy mother of goodness and for the love of all things kind and good and reasonable … WHAT THE HECK!!!!!! if anyone wants to know what it’s like to be brought to their knees in total desperation and feelings of utter defeat, two words -

POTTY  TRAINING..

We have had the privilege of potty training three humans AT THE SAME TIME…..you may be wondering why we would even attempt such insanity. Welp, Lij took roughly 2 years to figure things out, and about halfway through Lij’s endeavors, Ailey was ready and hopped on board. THEN, because Elsie just couldn’t be left behind, she had to be a big girl too. So there you have it -  three babes who went from diapers to toilet in a season of crazy that ended with mostly success(thank you Jesus). 

SO, to those of you have braved the torrents of rain(or pee) and courageously fought the good fight to what was a long and poopy battle towards victory, I commend you. To those who are in the trenches, you are brave souls. Hold on, persevere, there is hope on the other side.

The first stages or moments, or days, or weeks, or whatever you want to call the initial dive-in to potty training is like some kind of boot camp or high school initiation gone wrong(totally making that up because I was home schooled and really have no idea- but It’s fine...). It’s like for some reason our kids thought that the first time they were handed to us with no owners manual and the sudden responsibility of an entire soul to go with it wasn’t enough. However, somehow, that part is relatively short lived, and in the end you end up with rediculous memories, kids in underwear, and lots of love. 

        For instance, there was that time when Ailey came running to me(gotta give her kudos for her honesty...) yelling, “I pooped! I pooped!”. When I asked where, I was led to the closet… she then proceeded to point inside of a duffel bag, which she had somehow squatted into and subsequently done her business.

In case you were wondering, whenever you ask a two year old why they chose to go into the closet and poop inside of a DUFFEL BAG, their answer will ALWAYS be, “I dunno…”

Or that time we were on a family vacation….

We(the 6 of us) were staying in a beautiful timeshare. The girls were still babies, both still in diapers, but very interested in the potty deal. Lij was also in diapers, and also very interested in all of the functions of the body. We had three pack 'n plays placed in what we thought were strategic points throughout the condo. Lij was in a pack ‘n play in the same room as little joe. Our first night was actually pretty restful! The girls slept in and I hadn’t heard a peep from the boys room even though it was past their usual wake up time. After getting a few extras minutes of snoozing in, I quietly walked down the hallway towards the boys room and opened the door…..    

   It took me a minute to process the smell and color that permeated the room. The theme of that airy beachy condo was WHITE…...my friends, that room was white no more.  

     Lij had apparently woken up early and at some point done his business(whether his diaper was on or off at that point, I’ll never know). He then proceeded to decorate his pack ‘n play with his human homegrown paint. After finishing quite the masterpiece, he must have felt that the room needed more color because he was able to climb out of his newly decorated sleeping quarters and onto the all white queen bed. After the comforter and pillows were adequately upgraded in texture and smell, he proceeded to the walls and luggage. It was an impressive work of art.    

    I’m pretty sure the cleaning lady might have had other words for it but the timeshare insisted they clean up. So, I apologized more times than I can remember, helped hold trash bags, and checked on lij who was happily playing in a VERY bubbly bubble bath while the sweetest and bravest housekeeping lady did her job.

I have to say that lij’s fine motor skills were impressively on point when taking off his diaper, and his gross motor skills were off the hook to be able to climb out of that pack n’ play, so we’ll go with that for the silver lining.

For real though, raising these babies is an adventure, and the stories they make are straight up down right awesome.

I’ll take the pee stained carpet (thank you Jesus for carpet cleaners), and the pooped-in duffel bags any day if it means I have another day to love on THEM.